Method to Madness Podcast – A Word With M
Episode 38: “M Also Stands For Merlot”
Run Time: 31min 15sec
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You can’t have “Method” or “Madness” without “M”. Our series of Animazement weekend podcasts continues as our special guest, M, dispenses some wisdom on yo dorky asses.
This episode’s also given me the excuse I’ve been looking for to inject Garfunkel & Oates into the podcast. Give these girls a listen!
In the Method to Madness podcast, I’m joined with my good friend Kevin “The Business” Gray to discuss great anime and video games that you should be watching as well as ones you should feel ashamed you are watching.
June 15th, 2010 at 2:05 pm
“Right, so I wasn’t listening all that well, but before I drone on endlessly about shonen sports anime from 1972-78, let me double check, Eye contact no, looking at boobs, yes?”
Largely common sense statements, my friends, but sometimes, those are the ones people need to know the most.
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 3:57 pm
Where’s the quote from? O_o
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Tim Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 4:04 pm
Nowhere, I was just using them to indicate sheer unfettered facetiousness in that portion of my response.
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 4:08 pm
Heh… There are people whom I believe would let those words carelessly slip past their lips.
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Tim Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 4:31 pm
I’d not be surprised to hear them myself, I just didn’t have an actual instance to attach them to.
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June 15th, 2010 at 6:17 pm
To listeners: I’m SO SORRY for the cornucopia of “likes” in the conversation! Unfortunately when I get nervous and speak, they pop up like weeds between every verb and noun imaginable. My public speaking teacher would be ashamed.
Also thanks Sean for hangin in there with my list and having me on again!
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 9:22 pm
Of course!
I wouldn’t worry… The amount of verbal dregs that I usually edit out of these podcasts would drive you to madness.
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ZeonicFreak Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 10:27 pm
You’re apologizing for “valley speak”? I didnt really notice that much, and at least you didn’t sound like an airhead that druuuuuuuug out the word like, so its cool.
A lot of good info, I listened to this on my lunch break today at work. There is things i do need to improve on, such as im pretty sure i fall in the category of “explaining my life story in one fell swoop” and rushing that bit out. I kinda do tend to bring alot up at one point which im sure that annoys certain people, i just need to take my time in conversations more. I mean, we all have our faults, no one is perfect, but it doesn’t hurt to improve in areas here and there.
Ill admit my one weakness that really isnt my fault but then again it is maybe, and thats trying to get the conversation off the ground before the girl walks away. Whenever i talk to a girl im interested in, one of these things happen or are said, she either a) has 20 of her friends come OUT OF NOWHERE and she instantly forgets i exist when talking about something, b) she says she has a boyfriend out of nowhere or husband (where im at its 3rd husbands with 10 kids, the south sucks) or c) her boyfriend/husband shows up and im stuck with “… it was nice talking to you” and going “ah, great”.
I made attempts at Animazement to get a girl (plus a friendly bet of 20 bucks riding on it, but thats not the point) and it could never get past a way to meet them again or go any further in the convo before they just left. And im not really sure if that was something i couldn’t help or had no control over. I dont have a James Bond charisma on women (every guy wishes because life would be better) so its like “what can I do to get past the 3 sentences before they give me the options i explained earlier”.
For me, its like i have to go to the ” I need to contact you somehow” spiel because chances are i wont see them again and I at least felt some accomplishment for “well at least i tried”.
My goal wasn’t to say so much but then again maybe someone will agree on that or can understand.
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 11:01 pm
a) has 20 of her friends come OUT OF NOWHERE and she instantly forgets i exist when talking about something,
Here’s what ya do: As she’s being pulled away by her friends (or whatever might cause you two to part), tell her, “Well, I gotta move along, but I’m glad I met you, and hey–I’m going to go eat at X later… How about we meet up there and continue this then?” If she says no, then just let her go. If she says yes, get her number immediately so you can call her as you’re on your way to X.
b) she says she has a boyfriend out of nowhere or husband (where im at its 3rd husbands with 10 kids, the south sucks)
Well, this cannot be helped. Let this one go. If she’s on her 3rd husband with a litter of kids, then she’s probably a pain in the ass and you don’t want to date that no matter how cute she looks.
One of my favorite quotes–and I wish I knew who originally said it–is “No matter how good she looks, someone somewhere is tired of putting up with her shit.” Repeat this in your mind whenever you meet someone you’re extra attracted to and it might help dispel their charm.
or c) her boyfriend/husband shows up and im stuck with “… it was nice talking to you” and going “ah, great”.
Consider this a positive. You got face time with an attractive woman, which is only good. She may be hooked up with another guy, but the fact that she was digging you enough to carry a conversation should be flattering. Think of it as practice for keeping your conversational skills sharp for when you do meet a girl that’s both into you and available.
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ZeonicFreak Reply:
June 15th, 2010 at 11:24 pm
Ill definitely remember number one. That is good. I understand No pretty well, its universal to “not ever gonna happen buddy”.
Yea, 2 cant be helped (for good reasons usually) and 3 is good practice. I know that quote too, that was a very wise man who said that.
I tend to have luck with being attracted to women it seems most of the time will never go anywhere. But I am positive that will change, that is something im continuing the good fight on, even though i feel like the Glass Joe of asking girls out (and that one win for me is retirement LOL).
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M Reply:
June 16th, 2010 at 6:59 pm
Offering lunch or dinner is a really good tip. My heart is directly uplinked to my stomach, so offering a meal is going to perk my interest. I’d also add that a girl may not want to give out their number on the spot. Ask, but if she seems reluctant, ask for an email address.
Girls can also be wary of being alone with a guy if they just met you, so if you feel like she’s a little nervous, try to ask her to do something either with her friends or your group of friends so it’s not so intimidating.
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ZeonicFreak Reply:
June 16th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
I usually ask to go out somewhere to eat and also state “Hey, im buying” because im being a gentleman and I really dont mind.
I did at one point got an AIM name from a girl, to later get an IM replay from her boyfriend to back off (she included i was annoying when i only talked to her on AIM like twice in one month, i dont know). Thats something else i dont get about women. Not to go on a tangent, but can you explain why girls would give their info out to a guy when they are going out with someone? I mean, dont lie to me like that if your seeing someone. I mean are they looking why still with someone? I really dont get it.
Maybe she was and thought i wasnt that cool of a guy, who knows.
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M Reply:
June 16th, 2010 at 9:24 pm
I think one thing that guys assume but what may not be true, is that women don’t automatically think “hey this guy is attracted to me and wants to date me” when they get your information. They may just think you’re a cool guy and want to be your friend. That’s been my personal experience, anyways.
Relationships are sometimes a highwire of being clear about your intentions and also not moving too fast, something I haven’t mastered. It may have been that you were a little too quiet about the fact you thought they were attractive, OR the girl just liked the attention and was playing you. I really can’t say.
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 16th, 2010 at 11:22 pm
I’d also add that a girl may not want to give out their number on the spot. Ask, but if she seems reluctant, ask for an email address.
I did consider this, and it is true. My thought while making that suggestion was that if he and she are about to part ways, they’ll need to be able to reestablish contact.
The alternative is to just tell her that you’re going to X around Ypm, and that you’d really like to see her there to join you.
Time allowing, ask her to repeat the place and time to help commit to her memory before you guys split. It’s not as good as calling to re-confirm shortly before you go, but it might increase your chances.
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ZeonicFreak Reply:
June 16th, 2010 at 11:31 pm
Id figure that much.
I find it funny im the only person talking about this. I mean i like the responses and all and its great info… but im the only person asking. Well, at least your podcast wasn’t in vain, someone cares LOL.
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 22nd, 2010 at 8:09 am
We’re probably answering the same questions that other people have so they don’t have to ask here.
Or, you’re the only person with these problems. :p
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June 16th, 2010 at 10:48 pm
I was gonna go with “down right b****” for 200, but that is a good answer too.
I dont remember pressing anything on her, i was just trying to start a conversation with her on AIM like “how was your day” and such, then that happened. It happened long ago so its no big deal, but i was pretty ticked about it.
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June 21st, 2010 at 12:11 am
I ask girls how’s it going all the time and it seems to work. That opener really doesn’t work if you don’t change the subject after they say what they did.
ex:
Guy: “How was your day”?
Gal: “It was okay. I had a rough day at work”.
Guy: “Oh really, what do you work in”.
If the girl just says it was okay, don’t bother to reply back. She’s not interested!
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The Grey Ghost Reply:
June 22nd, 2010 at 8:06 am
Another good idea that gets you in the habit of listening is to reciprocate instead of just probing for her to expand on what she’s talking about.
So if she goes on to say that her boss sucks, you can respond with something like, “No kidding, right? Some people just fail upwards.” This will show that you’re both paying attention to what she’s saying and understand how she feels.
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